“Right said,” Fred said.

Dialogue tags and bloated verbing

“He said” as a dialogue tag feels so boring. Can’t we juice it up? Give it a little snazzola so that our readers know we can really write? After all, we read all those thick books full of great descriptions. Can’t we work that into our own writing?

Work with me here. And, no, Fred isn’t involved in this. I just used his name in the title because of the band. Their famous song has nothing to do with this article.

It’s the same old, same old, “He said, she said.”

Not us, though. We’re writers. We love big words and we know how to use them.

We writers might’ve said said better. “He expounded, she retorted.”

That’s efficient, isn’t it?

How did he expound? Did she calmly retort? I dare say not!

Let’s try that again. “He expounded arrogantly, she retorted furiously.”

Now we’re getting somewhere.

Still, there is so much left unsaid. What more could be said?

“He expounded arrogantly with eyes declaring his family heritage, and she retorted furiously as her nose flared in anger.”

Or did they?

I said it, so, in the context of the story, it must be true.

Wait, there’s more.